Why the hell is it so hard for us to accept help? The only time we’re in it alone is when we’re too stubborn to rely on those around us. We’re all struggling to adapt to 2020, part three, not to mention the never-ending surprises 2022 has already thrown at us.
I mean it’d be great if 2022 could stop killing the people we admire – Bob Saget, Betty White (yes I am attributing to 2022), Meatloaf…the list goes on.
When life hands you lemons, death or just a bunch of unexpected hurdles; you gotta let go of your pride and rely on those around you.
This is my advice to you, from someone who absolutely sucks at asking for or accepting help.
Let Them Be There For You
The end of 2021 threw some serious curveballs at my family. We lost Sarge, the heart of our family, in the most brutal way and Sammy, our Doberman, was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. On top of all that we had some turnover at the agency, which resulted in some hustling and adapting. Oh and did I mention I’m currently recovering from COVID? Yeah, good times.
Family, friends and my team all stepped up without being asked (because I would never ask) and dropped off meals, sent cards, checked in via text and simply pulled shit off my plate.
I had to stop myself from downplaying what I was dealing with and turning away help. The fact was, I did need help and I needed to rely on others to get me through and it did not make me weak or less than.
Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, the people who care about you need to feel needed? No one wants to see someone they care about hurting, and if dropping off a meal, sitting with you while you sob or ensuring you get your daily allowance of pizza rolls can also give them some peace, then shut up and let them be there.
Don’t Allow Guilt to Creep In
I’m not sure if this is a female thing or if all of us, regardless of gender, struggle with this but once we accept the help we have this overwhelming guilt about it. We have thoughts like, “someone else has it so much worse, and I can’t get out of bed because of a dog” or “it isn’t fair for someone on my team to have to do my work because I’m grieving or sick.”
STOP, just stop. No one, including yourself, gets to tell you the wrong or right way to deal with shit that is happening in your life.
Remember, you’ll come out on the other side and it’ll be you turn to step up for someone and force your help upon them. I can’t wait, to force myself on the people I love. It’s gonna be awesome. If you need me, let me know, I got some serious uncomfortable love to give you all.
